All That Jazz: Bad mommy

I feel like I've been such a bad mommy lately. Let me share a little back history: all my life in my house we have had cats, I love them, they are great furry little critters. I LOVE all animals to be exact (the furry kind). I have wanted a dog ever since I can remember. My parents response has always been "NO!" then it changed to, "If you get straight A's in school we'll talk". I was never a super star in school. So I kind of gave up on ever having a dog. I had asked "Santa" for a cat when I was 6 or 7, and low-and-behold Christmas day came and there was this little orange and white fluff ball of a kitty- named Fluffy. (Not real original as a 7-year old). This kitty was like a doll for me, and he put up with everything I did to him. He was more an outside driven cat, and that lead to his demise. I was devastated, along with mommy about my Fluffy not being here anymore. I was inconsolable for a week. Finally things got back into the swing of not having a kitty around. A year or so later, we are at the local Publix and the cashier has a few pictures of kitties on her register, my mom takes notice just to say how cute they look, she tells us, she's trying to find homes for a few. I get jumping up-and-down happy! We make an appointment to look at the kitties she has. As soon as i walk in I see a little stripped baby tabby kitty, and immediately want him! He has a home... :-( Mommy is drawn to a little shy skinny gray thing sitting on a shelf. She was a cute and cuddly, he name Blue Bell (already given to her, I wanted to rename her Smokey, but mommy wouldn't let me). Blue Bell was part of our family for 13 years. She was the fat queen of the house. She was pampered, pet, and fed real well. Somewhere along the lines of my sophomore year of high school (6 year ago). We have a little kinda skinny tan and brown kitty wondering in the back yard. Well me being the pet lover than I am, I quickly put a bowl of dry food out for him. He obviously not being stupid starts to regularly hang around. I was the good kid and put fliers around the neighbor hood with a picture and description and our number. No one called, so after a few weeks (and now he is inside the house) we officially make him ours (taking him to the vet for shots and snip snip). I named him Mr. Chatter Box (I was getting more creative with the names). So our house lived very harmoniously like that for 6 years. Blue Bell was getting old...needless to say nature had taken its course and she passed away quietly on the kitchen floor with mommy petting her. She was 16 years old. Chatter Box had lost his adoptive "mommy", friend, and playmate. He consoled mommy and me and would snuggle up next to us. After a little while I started to want another critter in the house. The response I got again, "NO!" then this no turned to (via mommy) "ok fine, you find me a kitty that looks exactly like Blue Bell, all dark grey with a patch of white under the chin and the belly"
me: "ok"
That was it, that was all she had to say, I went searching! I was on my computer everyday looking for those specifics. I found one cat at the Humane Society that matched the description in the photo, but when i saw her, it just didn't click. That was another demand, had to be a girl. A friend of mine had a little grey kitty with white under the chin, but it was a boy... not gonna work. I still searched, even though I was starting to give up. I went to petfinder.com typed in my "request" ::POOF:: a itty bitty grey with white girl kitty, PERFECT! Location: 2 hours north of me. I had to seriously think about this one. OK, done thinking, I was going to make one trip to "check out" the kitty, to make sure it matches the requirements and I took an old picture of Blue Bell with me for a comparison. I took one of my friends with me on this long 2 hour up and 2 hour drive back. We reach the rescue group, they showed us the room where the kittens were held. I open the door and right before me sits the kitty I am here to see. I scooped her up and immediately asked for the paper work to fill out. I filled out all my information, handed it over, and we set up a date for her to be fixed before she could be released. The drive back home that day was the longest ever, knowing I left the perfect kitty behind. The weekend that was scheduled for me to pick her up. My parents were going out of town to visit friends so I could get the cat bring her home and have her acclimated by the time they got home. I call up my friend ask if she's up for another drive. We hop in my car and drive again the 2 hours. We make it up there and I bound into that office with pure joy, ask for my kitty and they bring out A kitty... not MY kitty. Where is my kitty?!?!?! Did they give her to someone else?!?! I (needless to say) throw a fit. I open the kitten room door, and there again staring at me is my kitty. I pick her up, take her to the people behind the desk and say "This is my kitty!" Their response "OK, you'll have to wait another 2 weeks for the vet to come back to spay her" Did they not just realize that I drove ANOTHER 2 hours to get this kitty and now I'm gonna have to drive it again. Long story short, they wont/cant give her to me at that visit, it is FL law that all animals released by a rescue group be spay/neutered. No loop-holes around that (believe me I tried them all). The day comes to pick up my kitty again. I called the center stressing that the right one was fixed, they assured me she was. I get there and there is my precious baby kitty! We get in the car and go for the 2 hour drive home without any complications. Now this weekend I got her just my dad was going to go our of town. We make it home with the precious cargo who is now waking up from the anesthesia and running around and playing. My "Bubba" (Mr Chatter Box) doing relatively good with the new young en running around. Mommy calls me coming out of work asking what to do for dinner. I told her I'm not sure, just come home and we'll figure it out. Well apparently she had a a bad day at work and didn't want to come home and go out again. I begged and pleaded, and she came home. I was in the TV room with the little fur ball and heard mommy come in the door. I met her at the door with this doofy smile and told her I had a surprise. She looks at me like I have 3 heads. I told her to close her eyes and I'd take her to the surprise. She reluctantly did so. I guided her into the TV room, and baby fur ball was perched on top of one of the big pillows. I told mommy to open, and as soon as she spots her she starts crying and saying "No you didn't!" Well apparently I did. I pick the fur ball up and hand her to mommy, and its an immediate love. We later decide on the name of Baby Bell (in honor of Blue Bell). This itty bitty little nothing of a kitty is now bigger than my Bubba with the longest legs you would ever see, she looks like a dark grey panther. That was the completion of our furry family, or so we all thought. Mother's Day 2009 my friend calls me, "I'm at walgreens and I have 3 sets of eyes staring at me."
me: "You gotta be kidding me. What do you want me to do?"
friend: "I cant take them home, my mom will want the all and we already have 2 dogs and 5 cats"
me: "You are not doing this to me"
friend: "Then I have to leave them here"
me: "No your not, I'll be there in 15 minutes"
Hop into my car and drive to pick up 3 furry lil critters, telling myself the whole way, "They are going to the humane society tomorrow!"
I get there and they are the tiniest little thing you'd ever see, I forgot a vessel to bring them home in, the only thing I have in my car is a Build-a-Bear box. I catch all 3 and put them inside the box, proceeding yelling at my friend for calling me knowing I wouldn't say no. We gather them all up and in the car and its off to home for me. I get them home and put them i the spare bedroom with the door closed. They meow!
dad in next room: "What is that?"
me: "Well.... my friend called my and found 3 abandoned kitties and they are going to the humane society tomorrow I promise!!"
dad: "OK they better"
Mom is out to dinner with her friends. She comes home and notices the door closed.
mom: "What is in there?"
me: "um... well... just look"
mom: "Oh no...."
I show her and her heart melts at the 3 little faces staring at her and she starts petting on one. I tell her the same thing they are going to the humane society tomorrow. Well tomorrow turned to...never. "Tomorrow" was Mothers Day, Sunday. My boyfriend comes over and loves the little fur balls too. We call up his dad and step-mom to wish her a Happy Mothers Day. Half way joking we tell them we have a gift for her, we have 3 small kitties and she can choose one as her present. Now his dad is NO NO NO to pets, his step-mom and step-sisters have been begging for a long time. Apparently he had a change of heart and said "OK bring the little fur balls over and they can have their pick"
We waste no time getting them over there and they pick the smallest one of the bunch and name her Sushi.
I go home with 2 kitties. At work I ask around to anybody and everybody if they want a baby kitten. Most of the responses. "No thank you".
The friend that got me into this mess has another friend he goes to school with that might take one if it's a girl. Guess what? They are girl!!! He comes over to look at them and take the one all tabby with no white, her name: Bailey. I have one lonely little kitty left that has gotten quite attached to me and the other cats and now has control of the house. I cant give this one away, I have to keep it! Well after much deliberation and discussion we keep her, Tippy-Toes. (She is all tabby with white tips on her toes). She is my princess, my pride and joy, she snuggles with me, she is my baby. We now have 3 members to the furry family, one for each of us if you will. I will go through stages, more jokingly of "lets get a dog". Response to that, "NO! No more animals." I'd walk away ok.... One evening I was watching Dogs 101 on Animal Planet, and one of the dogs featured is a Pembroke Welsh Corgi (the Queen of England's dogs). I fall in LOVE with this dog! I have always wanted a BIG dog, a husky would be perfect, but Husky's in FL = not good, so I had to settle on that one. No other dog quite caught my attention like the Huskies, except this one. Now I also am not a fan of "small" dogs, but this one was cute, petie and perfect. I wanted one!!! I began searching, not many well known in south FL. One day my boyfriend and I have to run an errand and next to where we had to go was the pet store. "Oh come on, lets just check it out" As soon as we walk in, what is in the dog cages but a Pembroke Welsh Corgi. I almost die! I want it, I must have it! "Cant I play with it?" YAY! They put us in a small room with her and we can play, she is beautiful, and sweet. "How much?" "$800.00" ::GASP SHOCK AWE:: oh dear lord! That's a down payment on a car! I have to say good buy to my perfect little doggie. I still am on the search for one. I try everything, and I was being picky I wanted a pure Corgi, I was willing to pay some, just not $800. I tried craigslist, petfinder, the humane society... nothing. I was staring to give up. I looked one last time on craigslist and poof there was a full Corgi puppy that someone had to find a new home for. I emailed this person ASAP, I was checking my email every hour for the next week. I got no reply back, I was crushed. Just as my hopes were floating away I looked at petfinder. I found one! In my area! A full Corgi, girl, not a puppy but not a senior! She was 2 1/2. I called the number immediately and left a message and also emailed them for the adoption application. They sent on over the next day! I filled it out, and they loved me, wanted to meet me. We set up a date and I met this adorable dog and we clicked. It was love! I took her home for a weekend trial. We didn't think things were gonna go so good cause of the cats there had been a few fights break out. Daddy was a fishing trip the weekend I got her. He got home ans well lets just say he was less than pleased. He was furious! It was going back! For a full day and half he wouldn't look at me or talk to me. After this prolonged silent treatment I sat down with him and presented "my case". Answer still "NO!" After many arguments and yelling and crying (on my part) we settled. I pay rent to keep the dog. Dog original name: Roxy, changed name: Whiskey

Now getting to the part of being a bad mother. My baby princess of kitty feels like she has been replaced by the dog, and by all means she hasn't. But she sure is letting me know how mad she is. She sleeps in my parents room and cuddles with "grammie" (my mom), lets grammie hold her, as soon as she is passed to me, it leaps and bounds to get out of my arms. Every once in a while she will be laying on a table top and be sweet to me, let me pet on her and love her and sometime, sometimes give me kisses. I still feel like a bad mother, like my baby has abandoned me. I want my baby kitty to cuddle with me again. The reason I really really wanted to keep her was cause my my mom had "acquired" Chatter Box as her own, and Baby sure is hers. Tippy was suppose to be MY cat, now she's grammie's cat. I have decided that I will regain Bubba/Chatter Box as mine. When I move (ever) Chatter Box and Whiskey will come with me. Mom and I still fight over that one, even though my Tippy has chosen her as her new mommy.

I know this was a long post, I did not intend for it to be this long, but it is my pet story.

Pictures of Blue Bell coming. All I have of her, are from film cameras

Mr Chatter Box